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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28206969">Difficult Decisions</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/PadawanRyan/pseuds/PadawanRyan'>PadawanRyan</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon | Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Abandoned Work - Unfinished and Discontinued, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, Memory Loss, Past Rape/Non-con, Pining, Sailor Moon Original English Dub, Secret Identity, Teen Pregnancy, Unplanned Pregnancy, Unrequited Love</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2008-06-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2008-06-17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-11 00:15:46</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Rape/Non-Con, Underage</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,643</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28206969</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/PadawanRyan/pseuds/PadawanRyan</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Serena Tsukino finds herself pregnant after being raped. Her friends all choose to help her, but can she really trust them? Someone is after her...and this someone has no idea what is truly going on.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>One-sided Chiba Mamoru/Tsukino Usagi, Tsukino Usagi/Alan</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter One</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"Serena! Where have you been?"</p><p>I didn't answer. I didn't even stop. All I wanted to do was cry my eyes out, and I was on my way to the bathroom to do it. I could hear Amy running behind me, asking me questions, but I didn't even glance. I sniffled, and held back my tears for a few moments. I only had a few minutes until my second class started, and I needed to cry before then. I pushed my way into the bathroom, locked myself in a stall, sat down on the toilet seat, and began to cry.</p><p>"Serena? Are you in here? Why are you ignoring me?"</p><p>I didn't want Amy to know what was going on. Not yet. Not until I had the time to process what was happening. I know she could hear my crying, but I didn't care. As I slowed it down a bit, I reached into my bag and pulled out a journal. For the past few years, ever since becoming Sailor Moon, I had kept a written journal of all the attacks and battles. I skipped to a page, and began to read.</p><p>
  <em>March 18th</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I don't know why it happened. I don't know whether I should tell anyone.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>There was a battle. Between me and the those two. I don't even know what to call them, and I don't know why the scouts didn't come. Did they not feel that I was in pain, that I needed their help? I won't blame them though. All that matters is what happened.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He took advantage of me, and she kept laughing. I don't know why. It was painful, it hurt. I didn't know whether I would survive. I cried and I screamed but nobody came. It kept on happening.</em>
</p><p>My journal entries were often short and not very detailed. I never wanted it to get into the wrong hands. I remembered everything, especially that night. The shrill laughs echoed in my mind all month, and this morning. This morning now than ever. Slipping my journal back into my bag, I let my tears fall for a few more moments, until I heard the bell. I stood up, opened the stall, and noticed Amy silently waiting for me.</p><p>"Serena? Are you okay?"</p><p>"Yeah," I told her, "I'll be fine."</p><p>"Are you sure?"</p><p>I nodded, although I knew perfectly well that I would not be fine. Nothing would be fine. That night echoed in my mind, and I was facing the reprocusions of it. It was not my fault, but I knew people would say it is. How was I supposed to tell my parents? They didn't know I was Sailor Moon. I couldn't very well tell them that. Amy walked me to class, both of us silent as we walked along. I spoke no words during class, which I'm sure worried many people. I didn't care.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter Two</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"Serena, are you really okay?"</p><p>It was then after school. Amy was continuing to badger me about why I was so upset, and inside, I was still debating whether to tell her or not. I knew that sooner or later I would have to, otherwise she would do a reading on me and find out, so I stopped her in a corner of the hallway. I didn't know what to say at first, so I took a big breath.</p><p>"I'm pregnant."</p><p>There was silence for a moment, then, "How? When?"</p><p>"I was...raped. A month ago."</p><p>"When did you find out?"</p><p>"This morning before school."</p><p>Amy came closer and gave me a hug. It took all of me not to cry again at that moment. She held me for a few seconds, until letting go and stepping back, asking, "Why didn't you tell us?" I didn't know what to say. I was scared? Of course I was scared. I didn't want to know what people would think of me, Sailor Moon, being stupid enough to get raped. I fidgeted around with my fingers for a moment, staring down at them, before looking back up.</p><p>"I was scared. I didn't know what you all would think."</p><p>"Well, let's go to the temple. We need to discuss this with everyone else."</p><p>I nodded, and Amy gave me a pat on the back as we began to walk. Instantly, I almost found myself running into someone, but I ignored it and continued to walk. Nothing else was on my mind now than what other people may think. How would Raye react? And Lita and Mina? All these thoughts clouded my mind.</p><p>
  <em>"I'm pregnant."</em>
</p><p>Serena's pregnant? Alan began to think for a while. The girl seemed so young and innocent, how could she be pregnant?</p><p>
  <em>"I was...raped."</em>
</p><p>That explained it. Serena didn't seem like the kind of girl to give herself up. But why would someone rape her? What motive does a rapist have? One motive, to fulfill their desire. Also to cause pain. He sighed. Serena needed friends to be there. Alan had always hoped to be more than a friend to her, even if he had Ann standing around jealous, yet still clinging to another man. All Alan felt was that he had to be there for her.</p><p>
  <em>"Let's go to the temple. We need to discuss this with everyone else."</em>
</p><p>Alan closed his eyes and sighed again. He must find out sooner or later.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter Three</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"You're pregnant?"</p><p>"I'm sorry, Raye, I didn't mean -"</p><p>"How did you not mean to! Serena, how can you be so stupid?!"</p><p>Sniffling, I replied quietly, in nearly a whisper, "I was raped."</p><p>Everyone became quiet then. Raye, who was previously fuming mad, looked shocked and a little upset. Everyone was then staring at me, wanting to know more, but as the same time feeling sympathetic. I could tell by the way they looked at me that they were upset that it happened, and that they didn't even know. I couldn't help but start crying then, and Mina began to rub my back. Nobody said anything for a while, but I knew the questions etched in their minds. Finally, someone asked.</p><p>"When? Where?" asked Raye.</p><p>Lita added, "Who?"</p><p>"It was..." I began, "It was...it happened a month ago. On a rooftop."</p><p>There was silence one more, until, "What are you going to do?"</p><p>I had thought this over many times in my head. What was I going to do? There was not much I could do. I could keep it, and raise it, or I could put it up for adoption. There was also the choice of abortion, but I refused to do it. I would not murder my own child, no matter how horrible the conception was. There was no possible way I would kill someone so undeserving. Him, on the other hand...I would love to go after with the scouts beside me.</p><p>"I...want to keep it. Have my baby."</p><p>"But, Serena," began Lita, "You're only fifteen."</p><p>"I will survive. I have great people to help me."</p><p>"But what about being Sailor Moon?"</p><p>I had thought about that one too. What else was I to do? If I would not stand for justice and protect the universe, who would? Queen Serenity put me in charge of protecting the universe, and no one else by myself, the scouts, and the estranged Tuxedo Mask could do so. I had already made my decision on that topic, as well.</p><p>"I will continue until it becomes particularly hazardous to my baby or me. Then, I will lay low."</p><p>"But we need you Serena!"</p><p>"I know...but this is how it has to be."</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter Four</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"Hey Serena, do you have a minute?"</p><p>I turned around, "Oh, Alan. Yeah, sure."</p><p>Although Alan happened to follow me around, it always surprised me when he was right there, speaking to me. We walked slowly for a moment down the hall, me looking at the ground. It seemed as if he was trying to think of something to say. I didn't start at anything, as I wanted to hear from him first. Suddenly, he stopped, and I with him. Glancing at him a moment, he looked up at me.</p><p>"I heard you're...pregnant."</p><p>"Oh..."</p><p>He smiled, "I want you to know that I am here to help."</p><p>Exactly what I needed, more people to claim they're helping. It's not that I didn't believe any of my friends, or Alan, but it's that I was sure that everyone was putting more on their shoulders than they can handle. I had the most on my shoulders, and I felt that at any time, I could break down. It was nice that Alan wanted to help, though. I hadn't planned on telling him but now it was inevitable. Nodding, I looked at my feet, then back up at him.</p><p>"Thank you. I appreciate it."</p><p>"So have you given the idea any thought?"</p><p>Any thought? "It's all I've been thinking about! There's nothing I haven't thought about."</p><p>"What are you going to do?"</p><p>"Keep it." I had decided the previous night to keep it. "I will raise my baby myself."</p><p>Continuing to smile, Alan, replied, "I will always help you."</p><p>"Again, thank you. I could not -"</p><p>I was interrupted by a loud, "Alan!"</p><p>Turning around, I saw Ann coming toward us, looking very angry. I never understood it. Alan was her older brother, yet she always got jealous and upset when he was around other women. Although I noticed that she hung off of Darien all the time. It bothered me slightly, as I knew that Darien and I were destined to be together. As soon as he recieved his memory back, of course. Ann seemed fuming as she reached us and Alan sighed.</p><p>"What now, Ann?"</p><p>"Come on! We have to go!"</p><p>Alan smiled at me again, "Sorry, Serena. I will talk to you another time."</p>
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